94 Comments
Dec 13, 2023Liked by Louise Tilbrook

Let's just add knitting for oneself to the list of healthy self care approaches. The act of knitting and the wearing of a self knit item: a double benefit.

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Absolutely. I feel like giving this a big round of applause

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Our knitting for ourselves:

Our creating for ourselves:

Our mantra:

Self care is NOT selfish.

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This resonated with me so much! I just had a conversation with my family declaring that I would not be gifting anything handmade this year - knitted or otherwise - and I immediately felt a huge amount of relief. Nearly every knitted gift I ever gave has been met with little enthusiasm, I suspect for the very reasons you cite above. And the one baby blanket that I spent months working on for my god daughter was well-loved, but then lost in a matter of months! I was feeling guilty about reverting to just knitting for myself this holiday season, so I really needed to hear this. Thank you Louise!

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It's a very freeing decision isn't it. Difficult to make but so very worth while in terms of the peace it brings.

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Dec 14, 2023Liked by Louise Tilbrook

I totally agree!!

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I used to knit for the grandchildren but having got my 7 year old granddaughter on her own I discovered she didn’t actually want knitted clothes, no matter what her mum said. I’m surprisingly OK with it. I now just knit for those who want things and never to a deadline. Why would I do that to my favourite occupation?

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Exactly this. I have a friend who loves knitted hats but can't abide knitted socks - it's a texture/sensitivity thing and that's totally fine. It's only by actually asking people that we find out what they like or don't like

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Dec 13, 2023Liked by Louise Tilbrook

I gave up gifting anything to anyone a few years ago, it was just causing too much stress. People wouldn't like what I bought, and to be honest I was usually disappointed with what I got. So now a couple of charities get some extra money and my partner and I put the money we would otherwise have spent on each other towards nice meals when we're on holiday. Next year though I am aiming to knit a few hats and scarves with some stash so that when the inevitable call for winter Woolies comes along from charities next winter I will hopefully have a few items to donate that are not knitted in a rush.

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Husband and I never do big gifts anyway (we do a donation to Crisis) but I do sometimes try to knit some socks for him so he has something to open on Christmas Day. He's just as happy to take them at other times though :)

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My husband and I stuff a stocking for each other. Little treats and things you go through (like lip balm and hand lotion) go in there, along with a couple just for fun things. It’s low pressure and fun.

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This is very much my approach the last few years as well. I do exchange gifts with my (adult) daughters, something that is enjoyable to all of us. That being said, I also do enjoy giving small “just because” gifts when I come across something that I think someone will enjoy, and I make a lot of scrappy beanies for children’s charities.

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Dec 13, 2023Liked by Louise Tilbrook

No deadlines for me. I knit year round and choose from my stash of hats, scarves, shawls and socks when the time comes. That said, I had a proud moment earlier this year when I gifted two nieces a visit with me to London (my sister came also and helped with some of the cost). One morning the younger one (23) was wearing a sweater I had made for the older (28) when she was 13. ☺️

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Aww, that's so lovely

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Dec 13, 2023Liked by Louise Tilbrook

I no longer knit for anyone ’asking for something!’ It happens every time I’ve done so in the past: oh that’s not the color I thought it would be or wow when I asked you : I had no idea it would be so costly (if it was a commissioned piece, even though price was discussed previously! So no more commissions!) Basically I knit for myself, my grandchildren who ask for something or for a longtime very close friend whose tastes & colors I can predict and then it’s hears and smiles all around!!

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Totally with you. I knit socks for my sons and husband, and occasional things for my mum who is never afraid to specify colours/styles etc. She loves it when someone asks her where she got a particular thing and she can reply that it's a one-off :)

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Dec 13, 2023Liked by Louise Tilbrook

I am very much in the same group as you. I don't do deadline knitting. You hint at a deadline and my petulant inner toddler will drag her feet and sigh! Gifts for the knit wanting ones in my life get finished when they finish and saved for the next gift time. Mostly that's my sister and she tends to be super appreciative.

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My husband and son's will always take knitted socks whatever the season, and if I feel like knitting little baby gifts I do. Otherwise I keep a gift box and random things I knit during the year go in that, just waiting for their moment to shine 😂

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Deadlines shut down my creativity as well. I've learned to give myself more time than needed to get things done.

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Absolutely. I'd rather underpromise and over deliver 😂

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Dec 13, 2023Liked by Louise Tilbrook

Earlier this year, my youngest son told me how much he appreciated the things I make for him and his children. He said that those things are special because he knew I picked them out just for the recipient, then thought of that person while I was making the item. I nearly cried. I make things as I come across a pattern that makes me think about someone. I choose the color and type of yarn based on that person. When completed, I put it in my Christmas box. Right now, I have a sweater for my 4 year old granddaughter that I finished in June safely tucked away in the box!

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Aww, my goodness. That makes it all worthwhile doesn't it. What a genuinely lovely comment.

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Dec 13, 2023Liked by Louise Tilbrook

I sympathise. If I'm going to knit for other people they're important to me - and much as I love my family that doesn't necessarly include them! Colleagues having babies get a cardigan, graduating doctoral students get a scarf or shawl. But give me the due date or the graduation date as a deadline and it's not going to happen. I nearly finished a cardi for a colleague, it would have been finished by the time she was due to go on mat leave. She had her baby a week early and the cardi has been languishing for a month. I'm going to frog it and start again one size bigger.

And when I give a knitted gift I always say that I enjoyed the process but that doesn't mean they have to like the product!

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Oh, that last sentence is just perfect. I'm like you, I'm all about the process. If someone doesn't like a gift I'd rather they just gave it away or donated it to charity rather than keep it out of a sense of obligation

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I've only just taking up knitting ... Literally ... One hat and one scarf in ! But I've set myself a mission to knit a baby blanket for my sister who is expecting 🙌 I've already spoken to her about colours (I'm glad you mentioned that here, as I had ummed and ahhed, not wanting to ruin a surprise, but she had very specific colours in mind!)... I'm nervous but excited ... I really want to do a good job ... And I do have a deadline albeit a few months from now !

I think your points are all valid and actually very generous so no Grinch vibes felt over here ! 💕

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It's tricky isn't it. There's obviously a balance between something being a surprise and something actually being used. Sounds as though you got it right though. And how exciting to be knitting a baby blanket - they are honestly just the best gifts and are always so well received. When I had my boys I was amazed that all the blankets I could find were either huge cot-sized things or tiny ones for a car seat. The most used ones were those that came home from hospital with us (both were prems) and had been handknitted by lovely donors.

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I'm really excited! Noted .. medium sized blankets are good ! Thank you 😊

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Dec 13, 2023Liked by Louise Tilbrook

I love your knee high socks!

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Thank you. I keep saying I should knit another pair as I wear them a lot. They are super warm under jeans.

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Dec 13, 2023Liked by Louise Tilbrook

Now that I have learned how to make toe up socks (having made what feels like a million tiny stockings - actually 12, so far) I will definitely have to try my hand at knee highs. A 2024 challenge- accepted!

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Do they stay up? It's the one thing that puts me off knee-highs - remembering those bands of white elastic round my school socks to keep them up....

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These do because they are tad tight. If truth be told I should have added a little gusset shaping at the back of the calf but I didn't. If I did them again I'd probably put a marker at the centre back and add a few increases.

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So do I! I’ve no idea how to knot socks... is it hard?

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Dec 13, 2023Liked by Louise Tilbrook

I'm DO with you here, give me a deadline and I'll find every reason to do something else. My knitworthy folks are used to getting an unexpected gift at random times as the fancy takes me.

I knit constantly, it's my mental health time

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Deadline avoidance is a real thing isn't it 😂

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I totally get the “worthy” ones. I’ve hand made items at family members request only to then find said item is now a dog bed. I will knit for my kids, grand daughter and when he was here, my husband.

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Dec 13, 2023Liked by Louise Tilbrook

I love knitting over Christmas holidays and summer holidays (I work on a teacher's calendar), but things always take longer than I predict. I have a project in mind for a knitworthy friend who wears shawls, but I don't think I will be able to start it until June and I have had the emerald green and black silk yarn for 2 years. Stephen West MKALs and HKALs keep sidetracking me. Luckily I do not have a deadline. I just cast off the MKAL 2023 last night and I thought for sure it would be done by the end of November, if not sooner.

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I quit knitting gifts for others after I knit socks for my brother and he didn’t even try them on, complaining that they were too thick.

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Ouch, that's a hard lesson to have to learn. Far better to focus your efforts on those you know will appreciate them.

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Jan 8Liked by Louise Tilbrook

My brother actually threw out the socks I knit for him with lovely expensive (“manly colored”) yarn😖 !

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Eek, that's awful. No more knitted socks for him 😆

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